Saturday, December 4, 2010

Wonder

So, because I'm a sheep, and what sheep do best is follow, I decided to follow Ali Edwards' lead again and try this whole weird Reverb10 thing.  I like the way I call it a thing...that's totally somebody's mother being all judge-y there, right?

I hope, over the next couple of days, to catch up on the three days I missed, but for now, I'm going to start on the 4th prompt:



 December 4 – Wonder. How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in your life this year? (Author: Jeffrey Davis)


Hmmm.

I think I cultivated a sense of wonder by signing up for the TEEL program at Notre Dame College.  Since I've been working towards my teacher licensure I haven't  stopped wondering...  Long parts of my days are spent wondering:

  • Am I doing the right thing?
  • Was this a wise investment?
  • Will I be a good teacher?
  • Will I actually get a job when this is all said and done?
  • Am I actually smart enough for this?
  • What the hell are Grade Level Indicators?
  • SPA standards??  Huh?!
  • How much money will I make?  Will it be enough to support me?
  • How long will this take?
  • Will I be able to get a job in a district I want to work in?
  • Am I doing this assignment right??
  • WHY do we have to upload stuff to Tk20?
And on, and on, and on...

Anyone that knows me will tell you I'm a worrier.  But it's not just worrying.  It's wondering, daydreaming, hoping... wishing.  I am so very excited about the changes I'm making for myself.  I am so grateful for the goofy circumstances I'm in that have afforded me this opportunity.  I'm so happy that the people affected by this are willing to stand by me and support me.  I'm eternally indebted to the people who have made concessions to my schedule, who have listened to me whine, who have given my children rides to sports practices...  I am fully aware that I'm not doing this alone, and I have not stopped wondering how this "chance" happened into my lap all these years after I thought that "chance" was gone.

There are lots of ways to wonder, and I realize mine may not be the most romantic, or touching, but to me it is the happiest bunch of questions that I could be asking myself right now.

No comments:

Post a Comment